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By Meg Pierce, November 28, 2009 4:12 pm

Photo by Ed Yourdon via Flickr

I felt complete awe when one of my best friends in college, who’d had a distant crush on a law student we referred to as Tattoo Boy, actually went home with him one night after a random encounter in a bar. I was less thrilled when she told me how he’d said good-bye the next morning: “Call me. My number is in the phone book.” While my friend puzzled over whether he actually expected her to look up his number and call, I sat fuming in righteous indignation on behalf of women everywhere.

Although I personally never laid eyes on Tattoo Boy, he had a long-lasting impact on my life. My older more mature self would like to say that I learned to have respect for other people’s feelings. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case at the time.

The first time a guy ever spent the night, I kicked him out so fast he barely had time to pull his shirt over his head. In my defense, during our brief few months of “friendship” he spent an equal amount of time flirting with my friend (who had a boyfriend at the time) and spent even more time locking lips with her. How do you tell a guy, “sorry, but I actually think you’re a jerk and not worth my time?” He called repeatedly over the next few days, saying what a good time he’d had, but I was too chicken to pick up and tell him the truth. Plus, he deserved it. Didn’t he? Continue reading 'Dump As I Say, Not As I Do'»

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By Meg Pierce, November 23, 2009 12:45 pm

Photo by Kit Haselden

As a kid, I used to watch the surfers riding the curls on the other side of the checkered flag with such envy; they made it seem so effortless. These days I look at my friends in long-term relationships with the same jealousy. Yet, ask a skilled surfer to teach you to surf or a blissful couple how to date, and their instructions tend to be vague and unhelpful. They started young and have been at it for so long, they don’t really think about what they are doing, they just do it.

Having started surfing in my early 20s and dating in my late 20s, I’ve really had to concentrate on the learning process of these two challenging activities. The processes of going from that first date to being in a bona fide relationship and going from catching that first wave to being recognized as a surfer have a lot in common.

Learning with Another Rookie

The first time I attempted surfing, my older brother borrowed his friend’s longboard, and we spent the day taking turns out on the waves. I watched him keel over, he watched me take multiple nose dives, and at the end of the day I wasn’t any closer to learning to surf than I had been at the beginning.

My first relationship attempt was similar. Continue reading 'Everything I Know About Dating I Learned From Surfing'»